21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. 23 “Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold was brought to him. 25 Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.
26 “At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ 27 The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. 28 “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded. 29 “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’ 30 “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31 When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened.
32 “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34 In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. 35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”


  • How was your week? Any high points or challenges?
  • What have been the pieces of this series, “Relate,” that have stuck out to you the most so far?


  • How comfortable or uncomfortable are you even thinking about forgiveness?
  • Would you say you have seen forgiveness demonstrated well in relationships you’ve be a part of or had a chance to observe? Describe those experiences or relationships.
  • “Forgiveness is not the same thing as excusing. Forgiveness is not the same thing as forgetting. Forgiveness is not the same thing as reconciling.”
    • How do you see these three actions (excusing, forgetting, reconciling) as being different from forgiveness?
  • Matt gave us this definition of forgiveness: “the decision to cancel a debt” (Matthew 18:27, 32)
    • Why do we get hung up on canceling the debt? At the core, what do you think our fear is?


  • Who do you need to forgive? Where do you need to ask forgiveness?
  • Matt gave us four practical (but challenging) steps for living out forgiveness:
    • Identify who you’re angry with.
    • Determine what they owe you.
    • Cancel the debt.
    • Let the case go.


  • “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” – Lewis Smedes
  • “Not forgiving is like drinking rat poison and then waiting for the rat to die.” – Anne Lamott
  • “To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.” – C.S. Lewis